Mobiles on trains

If you have a mobile and you need to make a call, do so BEFORE you get on a train/bus. I don't expect to have to sit on a train listening to you almost yelling down the fucking phone because the train's noisy hearing about what Jim said or what's for fucking dinner!

Not only is it just plain rude and ignorant, it's likely that one day I'll lose my patience with you fuckers and scream in your ear so that not only are you deafened, the caller on the other end of the phone is too!

In fact fuck it, I'll just buy a portable mobile jammer from Japan and cut your calls off making it blatantly obvious that I'm the one stopping your phone working.